I have received several requests for an attempt on my behalf to make my links open in a new window. From my research, there is nothing I can edit in this blog to make it happen, however all you have to do is hold down the SHIFT key while clicking the link, a little annoying I know, but life can't be all fun, and since the rest of this column is all fun, this should balance it out.
I mentioned in an earlier edition that just because of my striking similarities to Eminem I would not pursue a rap career. I am beginning to re-think this one. I realize that you don't need to have any talent at all. Rap sucks now. It has reduced itself to naming activities you do while wearing a white tee-shirt...I can do that. I'll keep you posted.
Anyways, I have been advertising this post for a while now and it's time for it to happen. We all have fun watching real life sports and their over-hyped All-Star games, but it's time to give respect to the other All-Stars of sports...Movie Character All-Stars. I will come out with a new post for each sport I deem worthy to have an All-Star team, and then one for Hockey too. Without further ado...The Movie Character Basketball All-Star Team:
(Real players that appear in movies as themselves are excluded from these teams. No Michael Jordan in Space Jam or Larry Johnson from Eddie)
Forward (Team Captain)- Shep (Above the Rim). Behind Tupac in the picture, Shep is a legend of the game. Once retired after his best friend was killed while they were playing, Shep made an improbable comeback and dominated as soon as he set foot on the court. A born leader with attitude and all around game Shep is what every team looks for in a captain. His leadership is essential to hold together the rest of this team. NBA Comparison: Michael Jordan
Forward- Lewis Scott (Celtic Pride). Almost excluded from the starting roster due to his huge ego problems, Scott's talent just could not be over-looked. He showed towards the end of the finals (post kidnapping) more of a team mentality, that's when his game went to another level. When in the groove, he can score in bunches. NBA Comparison: Vince Carter
Guard- Jimmy Chitwood (Hoosiers). Perhaps the purest scorer in the history of the game, Jimmy would lead this team in scoring. He can absolutely light up the scoreboard. Without him, Hickory High would have been bounced from the Tournament in Round One. I hesitated at first including a high schooler, but Chitwood is a cut above the rest. I think I would give my right arm for his jumpshot...and just shoot it without an arm. His shyness problem would be solved by captain Shep, who would turn him into a stone cold scorer. NBA Comparison: Larry Bird
Guards- Sidney Deane + Billy Hoyle (White Men Can't Jump). I was trying to decide between them and I couldn't, they come as a package. Sidney has the skills, Billy the fundamentals and both know how to win. Shep could control Sidney's mental lapses and his tendency to look good, but lose. If pushed to their maximum potential, they could be deadly. NBA Comparison: Baron Davis (Sidney), Jeff Hornacek (Billy)
Center- Saleh (The Air up There). Huge seven-footer with a world of potential. Saleh is still a raw talent that needs to be developed, but he absolutely dominated the African Tribal League. His tremendous athleticism gives him the nod over the rest of a thin field of centers. NBA Comparison: DeSagana Diop
Coach- Norman Dale (Hoosiers). A no-brainer for the position, coach Dale would get this team to work together and fire on all cylinders. Perhaps the best coach for meshing talent and getting the most from the team. Questionable in game adjustments would be monitored by Captain Shep, who would make sure that the right play was called at the end of the game, and would never, ever, under any circumstances use Jimmy as a decoy.
Reserves:
Jesus Shuttlesworth (He Got Game), Air Bud (Air Bud), Odin James (O), H. Doyel (Hoosiers, point guard on South Bend Central), Kenny Tyler (The 6th Man), Jamal Wallace (Finding Forrester), Kyle-Lee (Above the Rim).
There they are ladies and gentlemen, if you got a problem with them or think I left someone out (your probably wrong anyways, but...) leave a comment.
I mentioned in an earlier edition that just because of my striking similarities to Eminem I would not pursue a rap career. I am beginning to re-think this one. I realize that you don't need to have any talent at all. Rap sucks now. It has reduced itself to naming activities you do while wearing a white tee-shirt...I can do that. I'll keep you posted.
Anyways, I have been advertising this post for a while now and it's time for it to happen. We all have fun watching real life sports and their over-hyped All-Star games, but it's time to give respect to the other All-Stars of sports...Movie Character All-Stars. I will come out with a new post for each sport I deem worthy to have an All-Star team, and then one for Hockey too. Without further ado...The Movie Character Basketball All-Star Team:
(Real players that appear in movies as themselves are excluded from these teams. No Michael Jordan in Space Jam or Larry Johnson from Eddie)
Forward (Team Captain)- Shep (Above the Rim). Behind Tupac in the picture, Shep is a legend of the game. Once retired after his best friend was killed while they were playing, Shep made an improbable comeback and dominated as soon as he set foot on the court. A born leader with attitude and all around game Shep is what every team looks for in a captain. His leadership is essential to hold together the rest of this team. NBA Comparison: Michael Jordan
Forward- Lewis Scott (Celtic Pride). Almost excluded from the starting roster due to his huge ego problems, Scott's talent just could not be over-looked. He showed towards the end of the finals (post kidnapping) more of a team mentality, that's when his game went to another level. When in the groove, he can score in bunches. NBA Comparison: Vince Carter
Guard- Jimmy Chitwood (Hoosiers). Perhaps the purest scorer in the history of the game, Jimmy would lead this team in scoring. He can absolutely light up the scoreboard. Without him, Hickory High would have been bounced from the Tournament in Round One. I hesitated at first including a high schooler, but Chitwood is a cut above the rest. I think I would give my right arm for his jumpshot...and just shoot it without an arm. His shyness problem would be solved by captain Shep, who would turn him into a stone cold scorer. NBA Comparison: Larry Bird
Guards- Sidney Deane + Billy Hoyle (White Men Can't Jump). I was trying to decide between them and I couldn't, they come as a package. Sidney has the skills, Billy the fundamentals and both know how to win. Shep could control Sidney's mental lapses and his tendency to look good, but lose. If pushed to their maximum potential, they could be deadly. NBA Comparison: Baron Davis (Sidney), Jeff Hornacek (Billy)
Center- Saleh (The Air up There). Huge seven-footer with a world of potential. Saleh is still a raw talent that needs to be developed, but he absolutely dominated the African Tribal League. His tremendous athleticism gives him the nod over the rest of a thin field of centers. NBA Comparison: DeSagana Diop
Coach- Norman Dale (Hoosiers). A no-brainer for the position, coach Dale would get this team to work together and fire on all cylinders. Perhaps the best coach for meshing talent and getting the most from the team. Questionable in game adjustments would be monitored by Captain Shep, who would make sure that the right play was called at the end of the game, and would never, ever, under any circumstances use Jimmy as a decoy.
Reserves:
Jesus Shuttlesworth (He Got Game), Air Bud (Air Bud), Odin James (O), H. Doyel (Hoosiers, point guard on South Bend Central), Kenny Tyler (The 6th Man), Jamal Wallace (Finding Forrester), Kyle-Lee (Above the Rim).
There they are ladies and gentlemen, if you got a problem with them or think I left someone out (your probably wrong anyways, but...) leave a comment.
posted by The All-Manac at 9:57 AM
5 Comments:
I love the airbud shout out ... thats a good call i think he may be able to crack the starting lineup in time. However, i think that Saleh may have some problems adjusting in such a competive league cause he ... uuhhh ... doesn't have any balls ... heres to hoping he doesn't end up like Candace Parker. However, if he does and people begin to celebrate what will become the lamest dunks of all time, I will castrate myself.
Zachary Gerard Hendrick Hilbers why didnt you tell me you had this page??
oh and nice idea, Movie Character All Stars, and I agree with them as well, good call on Norman Dale and never using Jimmy as a decoy
Stop this non important stuff. Start talking about how Eric Stall is the greatest hockey player in the world right now and Carolina is gonna win the cup this year and for the next 10 years
ok i have a few problems... one, saleh was an absolutely terrible pick for so many reasons, mainly that he wasnt good at all and 2nd he was recruited by kevin bacon who was supposed to be believable as a college star who would have been in the nba had it not been for a knee injury... i know im callin out a technicallity here but u said no nba player who appears as himself could be used.... therefore the obvious and i mean REAL obvious choice is shaq in blue chips, and also penny as a guard, altho i dont know whos spot he would take. im sorry to say it might be jimmys, who, as my other complaint, would not be able to outscore shep... neither one of them misses very often, but shep has YET to record a miss on screen, while jimmy did miss 2 shots in hoosiers. also, shep is just a better all around player who can play above the rim NO PUN INTENDED ha ha... also, u remembered jesus and didnt put him in the starting lineup... ill hafta change what i just said and have penny comin off the bench puttin air bud off the team... i realize the humor of puttin air bud on the team, but lets be realistic tho he was dominating in a league of what? middle schoolers? (im not positive, didnt see the movie...). also, jamel is off my team, bein replaced by the dude on the black team in above the rim... sure he didnt always play by the rules, but his toughness was undeniable and also he was good 2, bein the only player on the black team to score the entire game in a one point loss... might have attitude problems but remember jamel is the one who missed 2 foul shots on PURPOSE to lose the game, and also didnt really show much durin the course of the movie besides that he was real smart. scholar athlete yes, movie character all star team NO. speakin of above the rim, i also chose the point guard from the red team vs kyles team in the semi finals over kyle. altho kyle got the win, the red guy showed me way more. my last problem is the coach, who held practice with no basketballs, decided to play a game with 4 players and also as u mentioned decided to use jimmy as a decoy. but this is a hard one, cuz all movie coaches are horrible: nick nolte, admitting they cheated and forfeiting the schools biggest win in history... coach carter, in tryin to control his players LIVESSS and personalities... the coach of that movie with the all black starting 5 (cant remember the name) who had to be CONVINCED towards the end of the movie to let his players dunk and switch hands while dribblin... the obvious solution here is whoopi goldburg in eddie.. she turned a horrible team with no good nba players (ostertag doesnt count) to a playoff team. and last but not least, people are probably wondering about my strange interest in this topic which led me to write this extremely long comment and to those people i have no answer, what am i doin?!?!
KYLE F BABY
Nice post and this post helped me alot in my college assignement. Gratefulness you on your information.
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