So College Football is three weeks in and we now know a few things:
1) Michigan is for real
2) Notre Dame's defense isn't
3) The Pac-10 sucks at football AND officiating
4) Louisville may be in the National Championship Game
5) LSU has some athletes on defense
6) Auburn does too
7) Pittsburgh may be America's most underrated city
(I can't write this and watch the Michigan State v Notre Dame game at the same time...I will take a 3 hour break and reconvene)
8) One second...hang on....AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
9) Michigan State football hasn't changed one bit
College Football is great...while I could go on for about an hour about the latest of football hilarity provided by the Spartans, this column was created for another reason. Three words people...N.F.L. I've been busy and didn't do an NFL preview like I wanted. Whatever...I have reached a certain journalistic level when I can basically do whatever I want. In the words of Keith Hernandez, "I'm Keith Hernandez!"
I figured the only way I could recover from not having an NFL preview was NFL Power Rankings. So.....in reverse order....
32. Oakland Raiders - Andrew Walter takes over for the injured Aaron Brooks on the Raiders bye week...so he should only be sacked about 5 times this Sunday.
31. Green Bay Packers - While the Packers are terrible, they may have found a diamond in the rough with rookie WR Greg Jennings.
30. Tennessee Titans - The Titans might wanna look into starting Vince Young and running that Pro-Option offence that the Falcons are killing teams with.
29. Cleveland Browns - Cleveland's conservative offence is enough to drive Kellen Winslow to drive a motorcycle into a parking lot curb.
28. Detroit Lions - I am President of the Rod Marinelli fan club, and I'm about to purchase my "In Rod I Trust" T-Shirt, but I don't think Detroit fans truly appreciate just how bad the Lions were when Rod came here.
27. Houston Texans - I supported the drafting of Mario Williams because the team already had a proven runner in Domanick Davis...now they don't...and it shows.
26. Tampa Bay Bucs - I think someone might be kicking themselves for letting Brian Greise, last year's starting QB, leave this former playoff team that currently can't score points.
25. San Francisco 49ers - Alex Smith looked better against the Rams. Which is like when a hospital raises your status from "Dead" to "Critical".
24. New York Jets - I am a Chad Pennington fan, I'm glad to see he's healthy. Unfortunately, Curtis Martin isn't...and the team is lost.
23. Miami Dolphins - I tried to tell people this team was WAYYYY too overrated. Does anyone remember how terrible Daunte Culpepper was last year before he got hurt? Fans in Miami need to get a clue...first they do that stupid white out thing for the Heat...now they are chanting for Joey Harrington to play...
22. Washington Redskins - You can't spell "washed up" without "Mark Brunell"... because you need the 'u' and 'e'...
21. Kansas City Chiefs - I warned people against drafting Larry Johnson in fantasy leagues after he lost his best Offensive lineman (Willie Roaf) to retirement. Of coarse I got tagged with the third pick in my draft and Tomlinson and Shaun Alexander were off the board...so who did I get...
20. Arizona Cardinals - Getting Edgerin James was good for the fans, but all this does is prove my favorite point...running back is the most over-rated position in football. Unless you have an elite back, you can't run without a good offensive line or a good scheme.
19. New Orleans Saints - It's great that the Saints will be back in New Orleans for the first time since Katrina. It should be a great night for them on Monday...until the game starts.
18. Carolina Panthers - Calling Steve Smith....Calling Steve Smith....
17. Denver Broncos -This is one of two elite teams that just simply aren't as good as they were last year.
16. St Louis Rams - Being the second best team in the NFC West is like being the second best country in North America.
15. Buffalo Bills - Buffalo was said by many to have the hardest first 2 games of the year (at New England and at Miami). But the Bills were just an overturned touchdown away from being 2-0. JP Losman isn't great yet...but he's better...and so is the defense.
14. Philadelphia Eagles - That was a Michigan-State-like performance last Sunday by the Eagles. That's why I don't trust them.
13. New York Giants - After Eli's huge comeback victory last week, in which he didn't crawl into a corner and suck his thumb, I am beginning to think that maybe he isn't actually related to Peyton.
12. Seattle Seahawks - The other team that just simply isn't as good as it was last year.
11. Dallas Cowboys - TO broke his finger, but its a bye week for the Boys, my money says he doesn't miss a game...this isn't the preseason.
10. Minnesota Vikings - This team surprised me, they are playing hard for new coach Brad Childress, but a big game vs Chicago looms this Sunday.
9. Pittsburgh Steelers - Phew. It's a good thing Ken Whisenhunt didn't leave town in the off-season...how could the team score any points if he was gone?
8. Atlanta Falcons - FINALLY. They finally realized Michael Vick is a terrible pocket QB and got him one the move. Now no one can stop their running game...yet.
7. Cincinnati Bengals - I love Chad Johnson. I think he is great for the game. But boy did he get lit up this past week by Browns safety Brian Russel. (This team would be higher if they could stay out of jail)
6. Chicago Bears - Relax...it was the Packers and the Lions that you routed the last two weeks...boy is that defense good.
5. New England Patriots - Tom Brady needs a playmaker to emerge around him...maybe it's rookie WR Chad Jackson, or rookie RB Laurence Maroney, or TE Ben Watson...or maybe Brady doesn't need anyone around him...he's Tom Brady.
4. Jacksonville Jaguars - NFL's Most Underrated Coach: Jack Del Rio
3. San Diego Chargers - So...they got an LT on offence...and the next LT on defense...not bad.
2. Baltimore Ravens - What a difference a QB can make...rookie DT Haloti Ngata has awoken this dormant defense and is the front runner for Defensive Rookie of the Year.
1. Indianapolis Colts - I hate myself for this ranking...Objectivity sucks...
1) Michigan is for real
2) Notre Dame's defense isn't
3) The Pac-10 sucks at football AND officiating
4) Louisville may be in the National Championship Game
5) LSU has some athletes on defense
6) Auburn does too
7) Pittsburgh may be America's most underrated city
(I can't write this and watch the Michigan State v Notre Dame game at the same time...I will take a 3 hour break and reconvene)
8) One second...hang on....AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
9) Michigan State football hasn't changed one bit
College Football is great...while I could go on for about an hour about the latest of football hilarity provided by the Spartans, this column was created for another reason. Three words people...N.F.L. I've been busy and didn't do an NFL preview like I wanted. Whatever...I have reached a certain journalistic level when I can basically do whatever I want. In the words of Keith Hernandez, "I'm Keith Hernandez!"
I figured the only way I could recover from not having an NFL preview was NFL Power Rankings. So.....in reverse order....
32. Oakland Raiders - Andrew Walter takes over for the injured Aaron Brooks on the Raiders bye week...so he should only be sacked about 5 times this Sunday.
31. Green Bay Packers - While the Packers are terrible, they may have found a diamond in the rough with rookie WR Greg Jennings.
30. Tennessee Titans - The Titans might wanna look into starting Vince Young and running that Pro-Option offence that the Falcons are killing teams with.
29. Cleveland Browns - Cleveland's conservative offence is enough to drive Kellen Winslow to drive a motorcycle into a parking lot curb.
28. Detroit Lions - I am President of the Rod Marinelli fan club, and I'm about to purchase my "In Rod I Trust" T-Shirt, but I don't think Detroit fans truly appreciate just how bad the Lions were when Rod came here.
27. Houston Texans - I supported the drafting of Mario Williams because the team already had a proven runner in Domanick Davis...now they don't...and it shows.
26. Tampa Bay Bucs - I think someone might be kicking themselves for letting Brian Greise, last year's starting QB, leave this former playoff team that currently can't score points.
25. San Francisco 49ers - Alex Smith looked better against the Rams. Which is like when a hospital raises your status from "Dead" to "Critical".
24. New York Jets - I am a Chad Pennington fan, I'm glad to see he's healthy. Unfortunately, Curtis Martin isn't...and the team is lost.
23. Miami Dolphins - I tried to tell people this team was WAYYYY too overrated. Does anyone remember how terrible Daunte Culpepper was last year before he got hurt? Fans in Miami need to get a clue...first they do that stupid white out thing for the Heat...now they are chanting for Joey Harrington to play...
22. Washington Redskins - You can't spell "washed up" without "Mark Brunell"... because you need the 'u' and 'e'...
21. Kansas City Chiefs - I warned people against drafting Larry Johnson in fantasy leagues after he lost his best Offensive lineman (Willie Roaf) to retirement. Of coarse I got tagged with the third pick in my draft and Tomlinson and Shaun Alexander were off the board...so who did I get...
20. Arizona Cardinals - Getting Edgerin James was good for the fans, but all this does is prove my favorite point...running back is the most over-rated position in football. Unless you have an elite back, you can't run without a good offensive line or a good scheme.
19. New Orleans Saints - It's great that the Saints will be back in New Orleans for the first time since Katrina. It should be a great night for them on Monday...until the game starts.
18. Carolina Panthers - Calling Steve Smith....Calling Steve Smith....
17. Denver Broncos -This is one of two elite teams that just simply aren't as good as they were last year.
16. St Louis Rams - Being the second best team in the NFC West is like being the second best country in North America.
15. Buffalo Bills - Buffalo was said by many to have the hardest first 2 games of the year (at New England and at Miami). But the Bills were just an overturned touchdown away from being 2-0. JP Losman isn't great yet...but he's better...and so is the defense.
14. Philadelphia Eagles - That was a Michigan-State-like performance last Sunday by the Eagles. That's why I don't trust them.
13. New York Giants - After Eli's huge comeback victory last week, in which he didn't crawl into a corner and suck his thumb, I am beginning to think that maybe he isn't actually related to Peyton.
12. Seattle Seahawks - The other team that just simply isn't as good as it was last year.
11. Dallas Cowboys - TO broke his finger, but its a bye week for the Boys, my money says he doesn't miss a game...this isn't the preseason.
10. Minnesota Vikings - This team surprised me, they are playing hard for new coach Brad Childress, but a big game vs Chicago looms this Sunday.
9. Pittsburgh Steelers - Phew. It's a good thing Ken Whisenhunt didn't leave town in the off-season...how could the team score any points if he was gone?
8. Atlanta Falcons - FINALLY. They finally realized Michael Vick is a terrible pocket QB and got him one the move. Now no one can stop their running game...yet.
7. Cincinnati Bengals - I love Chad Johnson. I think he is great for the game. But boy did he get lit up this past week by Browns safety Brian Russel. (This team would be higher if they could stay out of jail)
6. Chicago Bears - Relax...it was the Packers and the Lions that you routed the last two weeks...boy is that defense good.
5. New England Patriots - Tom Brady needs a playmaker to emerge around him...maybe it's rookie WR Chad Jackson, or rookie RB Laurence Maroney, or TE Ben Watson...or maybe Brady doesn't need anyone around him...he's Tom Brady.
4. Jacksonville Jaguars - NFL's Most Underrated Coach: Jack Del Rio
3. San Diego Chargers - So...they got an LT on offence...and the next LT on defense...not bad.
2. Baltimore Ravens - What a difference a QB can make...rookie DT Haloti Ngata has awoken this dormant defense and is the front runner for Defensive Rookie of the Year.
1. Indianapolis Colts - I hate myself for this ranking...Objectivity sucks...
posted by The All-Manac at 1:31 AM
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